Smiler Girl

Posted on July 8, 2022 by gonexc

Dear Zak,

There were three biscuits as usual on the sink this morning. I unlocked the back door but there was no gentle mouth by my left hand when I let it fall to my side, waiting to take the biscuit from it. Roxy was not there. My Smiler Girl is gone.

We took Roxy to the vet yesterday morning after a particularly energetic visit to the Wag Zone where I took these photos. She’d been diagnosed a month or so back with liver cancer and Marianne had to giver her chemotherapy drugs as well as a very complicated diet in light of her pancreatitis. At first she coped but recently had become very picky and was eating less and less and losing weight. The vet redid the ultrasound scan and the news was not good – the cancer had spread and was aggressive. The decision was made to stop the chemotherapy, bring her home and spoil her with whatever she really liked to eat for the few weeks she was estimated to have left.

Around 10 p.m. last night she became very distressed and was clearly bloated and in a lot of pain. We rushed her back to the vet who diagnosed gastric torsion (which saw the end of Jenni all those years ago) and Marianne made the decision to let her go. She was not even seven years old. Poor girl, she did not have good luck with her health even when she was younger.

I will miss her big, goofy smile with ears curled back that greeted me when I came home. Smiler. Run free soft girl. I stroked her soft muzzle one last time then we laid her to rest next to you my boy.

Chemo again…

Posted on April 27, 2021 by gonexc

Oh, I feel awful!

I know my boy, I can see you do. It’s the chemotherapy again.

The cancer is back, isn’t it?

Yes, I’m afraid it is.

Is that why my hock is painful again?

Yes, actually you have a small fracture in that joint because the cancer has weakened the bone.

Oh no, there go the walks again. I do enjoy getting out to the farm. All those smells.

Yes, I know you do. And the cancer has gone to your lungs again too.

But last time we checked I was all clear, what happened?

I don’t know my boy. That’s the way of cancer. Just when you think you have it beaten…

Do you think this is it, the final run?

I don’t know, my boy, I don’t know. I hope not. We took the decision to try everything possible to get you some more time. We have to try, you are too special not to try even if the side effects are bad.

When will you know if the treatment is working?

In three week’s time you will have to go back to get another set of X-rays. Then we will have to make a decision.

Well three weeks is a long time for us dogs. I can’t wait to feel better and get back to some sort of normality.

By normality do you mean barking at Tia when she gets annoying?

Well yes, that too. And getting back to walking on the farm. And seeing the other dogs out for walks on the way.

Yes, let’s focus on that. You always liked coming to work with me and I suspected it was as much for the sights along the way as anything else. There was not a lot at the nursery to interest you.

Except for when I scored a sandwich off Rory.

That I thought you had stolen.

What me steal food? Never! That’s not my style.

And I had to give you permission to eat the sandwich.

Of course, I am a good dog!

Yes you are my boy, you always have been.

If this is the beginning of the end…

Yes?

You will be there for me, at the end I mean?

Yes, of course I will. I have always promised you that.

And rub my ears.

Of course.

And don’t cry.

No, I don’t promise that.

Until then we must focus on positive things. Walks, smells, barking!

Walks, smells and barking.

You train easily!

It’s good news!

Posted on January 6, 2021 by gonexc

It’s good news – we can’t see any sign of your cancer!

Am I cured?

No, probably not. It’s called “in remission” meaning it’s not active but it’s still around..

So it will be back?

I’m afraid so, we can’t say when.

So the cough was just that, a cough?

Yes, the vet couldn’t see anything bad on the X-ray. Bone cancer often moves to the lungs but nothing. Clear in your back leg too.

But in the meantime I can go running?

Of course, but it won’t be for a while.

Oh, it’s that covid thing again isn’t it.

Yes, but this time it’s for a whole month.

A month. That’s a long time for us dogs.

I know, but there’s nothing we can do about it.

I don’t like that photo, I am coming third. I used to be able to beat Tia and Roxy easily.

Well you have got 3 legs so it’s appropriate.

That’s not a good joke. But I am improving aren’t I.

Yes my boy, you’ve come a long way.

You just can’t keep a good Ridgeback down!

That’s not fair!

Posted on June 7, 2020 by gonexc

I’d rather be running

That’s not fair!

I’m sorry my boy, cancer is brutally unfair.

Why can’t you take me along for the ride then, it’s better than lying here.

Because it’s so difficult to get you into the pickup. I can’t help and Marianne is not strong enough. That’s how you hurt your leg last weekend and look how far it’s put you back. I know how much you like getting out but I needed to take Roxy and Tia for a run to get rid of some energy.

I wanted to come with you to work on Thursday too.

I know, I know. I remember how much you liked coming to the office with me even if you didn’t do much when we got there.

Us Ridgebacks have good eyesight so it was always great to see what was going on from the front seat. And I dig get to chase the odd chicken when you weren’t looking.

Jenni also liked coming along for the ride, she’d often see francolin before I did when we were out on the farm.

I’m not going to run again am I?

No, I don’t think so. I am building a wheelchair to support your back leg. That will allow you to run.

So that’s what that thing is. Not sure I’ll like it.

Please try, you will be able to move much quicker.

Oh, I do miss running! I can still run in my dreams.

So can I.

You haven’t always used walking sticks then?

No, when I was young I could run. I wasn’t as fast as you of course but I did enjoy it.

Wow, I’d have loved to go running with you!

We can run together in our dreams.

Yes, we can. That will be fun. I will slow down for you.

The bad news

Posted on May 30, 2020 by gonexc

A regal fellow

It’s not good news my boy, the cancer is back.

Oh. That’s disappointing. Is that why I find it so difficult to run?

Yes, it’s weakening the bone in your back leg. I’m so sorry, I was hoping you’d get another year at least.

Oh, so it’s going to be quick then?

Yes, a few weeks at the most if we don’t redo the chemotherapy.

What will that give me?

A few more months at the most.

What about the side effects?

The vet couldn’t really say. They might be bad or not and there is still the risk that the leg could break.

Like happened to Kharma? I don’t want that!

No, that would be terrible.

Please don’t cry, you’ve given me a good life. I’m sure you’ll make the best decision for me.

But we were supposed to grow old together!

Ah, well some things are not meant to be. I’ll always remember the running, it was so much fun – what I was born to do. I was fast wasn’t I?

Yes, 50km per hour at a burst. I wasn’t so impressed with you running and barking at the truck.

Ah, well, us Ridgebacks need a little danger for excitement.

What do you think of the photo?

I like it. It’s me – quite regal! Print it out to remind yourself of me.
You will be there at the end for me?

Of course.

Rub my ears won’t you?

Yes, I’ll do that.

What does it all mean?

Posted on December 10, 2019 by gonexc

That’s heavy stuff

So this cancer thing, does it mean that I’m not going to get old?

Probably, we don’t really know but the vet things we can get you another 2 years at the most. Maybe more if we are lucky.

Two years is a long time in dog-years though. That doesn’t sound too bad. But what about my leg, will it grow back?

No, I’m afraid not. That’s where the cancer was so it had to go to hopefully stop it spreading.

Wow, I’m glad you didn’t tell me that beforehand. Having a leg amputated was hectic!

Sorry my boy, the other option was to do nothing and if we’d done that you probably wouldn’t be talking to me now.

So three legs it is. A bit difficult to chase on three legs but I don’t think I do a bad job of it.

You certainly are coping well even if Tia out runs you.

Hmm, yes, that is a bit difficult to stomach.

Now that I’ve finished the chemotherapy, will I have to go back for anything else?

The vet says he wants to see you in a few weeks for a checkup; to see if the cancer has spread to your lungs.

I’m not sure if I want to know the answer to that.

Nor am I.

All this treatment, it was expensive wasn’t it?

It was a lot by today’s standard. But you are worth it.

What do you mean by today’s standard?

Well, back in the days when we used real US dollars I had a lot more money.

So what’s happened?

The government stole all the money.

Wow, that’s not very nice, what have they done with it?

Who knows, used it to spend on themselves and have a bigger collection than the next person.

Well, you still have me. And here’s to luck.

Yes, I still have you. Here’s to luck.

Goodbye Kharma

Posted on February 13, 2017 by gonexc

Warm. She was always warm and cuddly.

Happiness is – a warm surrogate mother.

Soft ears, puppy ears even when she was older.

Playful.

First games

Loving. Very expressive eyes too.

Art of the raised eyebrow

Cheeky at times.

Don’t even think of it Zak!

She was just putting you in your place.

And clever.

Well yes but I did cheat her out of an avocado. Once.

That tail, that full-body-tail-wag and the Kharma smile, with her ears rolled back!

The Kharma smile

Yes, she was always so pleased to see you. 4 minutes or 4 days, it was all the same to her. She was just pleased to have you back.

And she was so gentle with you – tolerant.

Yes, she would always play with me.

And she was the first to play with Roxy and Tia when you didn’t want to know them.

Kharma, Zak and Roxy playing

Well I did find them annoying, at first.

She wasn’t much of a runner.

Stepping out – whilst Kharma was still the quicker of the two.

No but she’d get that look in her eye and flick up her front paws and then she’d try and knock you flying.

Come on, there’s running to be done!

Yes, that was fun. But that last run…

Not your fault my boy. The cancer was already in her leg and made it weak which was why it broke.

Is that why it took so long to heal?

Probably. But in the end it was another tumour that stopped her from eating.

Aww. I’ll miss her. She was such a gentle lady. And well-behaved too!

Gentle Kharma

Yes she was. Those big soft eyes and the ability to fit in anywhere. She could also be very manipulative. Especially with Helen.

Training Helen

She loved you.

Just the two of us

And I her. Before you were around I’d come home and she’d do several circuits of the house at full speed to show her delight. And if I’d left her inside she’d stand on my mother’s dressing table to look out of the window and check if it was really me.

Her claw marks are still there…

When she first arrived she was so nervous. I let her out of her crate in the Land Cruiser and a few minutes later she’d disappeared. Didn’t know how I was going to tell Cheryl.

Out and about in the Tsetsera mountains

Where’d she gone?

Back in her crate in the Land Cruiser! It took her a long time to settle down but then suddenly she just accepted me and I was home and she was my best friend for 7 lovely years.

Kharma in her prime. A good looking and gentle girl.

She didn’t go alone did she?

No my boy. I held her and told her how much I loved her – all the way to the end.

You’ll be there for me too won’t you?

Of course I will. Of course.

Goodbye sweet Kharma, we love you.

My brother, Duncan, and Kharma two days ago.

The last day. The eyes say it all.

I am Zak

Zak, Rhodesian Ridgeback puppy, raconteur, undeniably cute!

Tag Archives: cancer

Smiler Girl

Chemo again…

It’s good news!

That’s not fair!

The bad news

What does it all mean?

Goodbye Kharma