Eye of the hurricane

Posted on April 23, 2013 by gonexc

A moment of calm

They say the calm Is before the storm
And the eye of the hurricane is quiet.
But little Zak has the will
And time to kill,
So be alert for the puppy
Who is quiet!

Aw, that’s nice. You’ve written me a poem!

No, I have written a poem ABOUT you. I don’t think you really understand it.

It doesn’t matter, YOU’VE WRITTEN ME A POEM!

All right, all right. I wrote a song about Jenni once.

To music?

No, I don’t have that sort of talent.

But Jeanette does!

Yes, remind me when she gets back from South Africa. She’s not too well at the moment.

That’s OK, I’ll give her a big wet kiss to feel better!

Lawd a’mercy. Just remember to wash your tongue first, I know where it’s been.

In trouble

Posted on April 21, 2013 by gonexc

I am in trouble, aren’t I?

Oh yes. Why did you have to disassemble my electric razor?

Well. It sort of had that chewable appeal.

But it was NOT chewable!

No, not really. Can you fix it? You seem to be good at fixing things.

It depends if I can find the missing parts. No, I am not going to follow you all day to see if you ate them.

I don’t think I ate anything. I am not that bad! You shouldn’t have left it where I could get to it.

Oh thanks for shifting the blame.

Well even you should know the motto; Never in the field of puppy-kind has so much destruction been wrought by one so small in such a short time.

Where did you hear that?

Oh, somewhere. What does “wrought” mean?

Done. Past tense.

Oh, well, you will get over it. Anyway, I did have a good afternoon at the microlight club didn’t I? I met a Jack Russell with an attitude, some other dogs, those girls who like to play with me and those funny other looking things that look like they should be chased.

Goats. They are goats. Yes, it was a good afternoon.

Running with Kharma

I think they might be chaseable!

The insult

Posted on April 17, 2013 by gonexc

Your breeder has put this notice on Facebook saying how good all you pups are.

Am I mentioned?

No, not as such.

But I have my own blog!

I know, a bit of an insult really. Maybe he’s embarrassed about your lack of a ridge.

Not an issue for me. I know I’m pretty good-looking.

If not a touch vain. And you also excelled at your first puppy class but didn’t get a rosette like one of your brothers.

What’s a rosette?

A little flower-sort-of-thing made of ribbons.

Can you eat it?

Well, yes but it wouldn’t taste very nice.

Not much good to me but I bet I could shred it!

I don’t doubt it.

Understanding no

Posted on April 14, 2013 by gonexc

Just me!

Which part of no are you not getting?

It has parts?

No, but it does have a meaning.

Oh. Give me some clues.

Desist. Stop doing what you are doing. What you are doing is a bad idea. In short; NO!

Ah, I think I do get the gist of it sometimes.

But not very often. Would a bit of bribery help? It seems to work most places in Zimbabwe these days. Some little reward perhaps? Food?

Ah, yes. That sounds like a GREAT idea!

OK, we’ll work on it that way. Oh, and by the way, we are going to a puppy training class tomorrow morning.

Wow, that sounds great. Lots of puppies to play with!

Well, yes and no. There may be some of that but I think a lot of it is learning the meaning of no!

Zak the Destroyer

Posted on April 10, 2013 by gonexc

I AM ZAK THE DESTROYER – TREMBLE IN FEAR ALL WHO CROSS MY PATH!

The washing basket, I see, has already fallen.

YES. THE DESTRUCTION CONTINUES APACE!

Hmm, now the shoes. Veritably they quiver. Call the Avengers.

AVENGERS WILL GROVEL IN TERROR. ZAK WILL CONQUER ALL!

Actually I think we could have the plot of the next Avengers movie here. A horde of Zak clones threatens the very fabric of American society until someone discovers the secret weapon.

THERE IS NO SECRET WEAPON. I FEAR NOTHING. I CHEW ALL WITH IMPUNITY.

Biltong.

Biltong? Where? Someone has biltong?

No. Just kidding but I am more than a bit concerned at your chewing capacity. And I wish you would not chew me. I long for the day that I can love you without you loving me to bits – literally.

Oh, I thought you had some biltong.

Destruction in his wake

Without me?

Posted on April 10, 2013 by gonexc

But you are going without me!

‘Fraid so.

Why?

There are things I have to do this afternoon where you’d be in the way.

But I would be good!

Hmm. Not so sure about that. I cannot rely on other people to catch you when I can’t!

Oh. So you will be back for walk time?

No. Much later. I am going to the opening of an art exhibition and I don’t think you are up to the crowds yet. Kharma will look after you. (And she did and you got into the fallen avocados in a big way!)

You are going without me?

A good day

Posted on April 7, 2013 by gonexc

Hey, that was a really good day!

Yes, you did really well and exploited your “cuteness” to the max.

Why not? I had two people to play with at the Gallery Delta, another 3 at the microlight club AND I scored a ball and biltong off Mary-Ann – she’s a pushover!

All girls love a puppy

And then I had a nice warm Kharma to sleep on when it got cold.

And only one puddle in Puddle Passage when we got back.

Hey, that wasn’t my fault, the back door was closed when I needed to go out.

Fair enough!

Day’s end

An expensive night

Posted on April 5, 2013 by gonexc

Well, that was quite a night.

Yes, it was wasn’t it. One sizeable puddle on the bed, a small one on the carpet and two outside requests.

Don’t forget the spider!

How could I – I have to go and pay for that today. Why didn’t you listen to me?

Well, it looked so interesting. All those legs at funny angles and things. How was I to know it was going to bite – did you?

No, I didn’t, but I did call you because I thought it was not a good idea. Your lip certainly came up nicely too. Well, the vet was right – you are fine now. But they do charge spectacularly for after-hours consults.

Oh, I’ll pay you back!

Yes, Zak, I’m sure you will. Now please return the salt to the packet and my shoes and T-shirt to the bedroom!

The play begins

Posted on April 2, 2013 by gonexc

You two are getting on better now.

Yes, she plays well, but she is so strong!

Well I think Kharma plays very gently with you considering her strength and weight. She even lets you get the upper hand now and again.

But this morning she really gave me a telling off!

Well, she’s no longer young and an older dog must be respected – she doesn’t want to play ALL the time. I hope you remember how gentle she’s been with you when you get big and strong.

Oh I will!

And I will remind you…

Let the play begin!

A small setback

Posted on April 1, 2013 by gonexc

Why did you shut me out?

I got fed up with you using the lounge as a toilet. I really thought we’d got past that!

Hey, I just a puppy! I need time to get used to these concepts.

Yes, but you were going so well. Last night I let you out at bedtime, you had a pee then turned round, ran into the lounge and did something altogether more serious and smelly! The second time in an evening!!!

I’m sorry, will you accept a lapse of concentration?

Yes.

Maybe you are expecting too much of me too soon.

I guess you are right.

May I come in now, please?

Of course.

Why have you shut me out?

I am Zak

Zak, Rhodesian Ridgeback puppy, raconteur, undeniably cute!

Monthly Archives: April 2013